If you don't like the weather in New England...

Ten days ago it was 66º F here, and this morning my thermometer reads 5º. They're listing the wind chill at -9º. If you don't like the weather in New England, wait a minute, as the saying goes. The quote is attributed to Mark Twain, but what he actually said is better:

I reverently believe that the Maker who made us all makes everything in New England but the weather. I don't know who makes that, but I think it must be raw apprentices in the weather-clerk's factory who experiment and learn how, in New England, for board and clothes, and then are promoted to make weather for countries that require a good article, and will take their custom elsewhere if they don't get it.

There is a sumptuous variety about the New England weather that compels the stranger's admiration -- and regret. The weather is always doing something there; always attending strictly to business; always getting up new designs and trying them on the people to see how they will go...

And that was long before global warming was a twinkling in these apprentices' eyes. Now, a UNH scientist has developed a regional climate model that predicts balmy winters (what we've generally been having this year) and periods of torrential rain and floods alternating with drying and drought. Sounds like a bad case of IBS.  (Sorry, I've been spending my days writing about bowel dysfunction. Speaking of work, I must wrap this up and get back to colonic transit...)

They're predicting somewhat warmer weather tomorrow, snow tomorrow night, and "wintry mix" on Friday, which can mean anything but inevitably will be slippery. Those apprentice clerks are busy mixing things up again.

Comments

[Teju]

I love Mark Twain. He's so arch, it's brilliant.

[Joe]

In an odd way it's almost nice that it's cold here again, I'm not exactly looking forward to going out for my shift this afternoon but it really feels more natural.

I've never read Mark Twain. From the quote he seems like someone I'd be interested in.

[Roberta]

Can you believe in balmy Austin we had an ice storm? I still can't get over it. I haven't left the house in days. All schools are closed, mail delivery has stopped, even Dell computers shut down - they're a big employer here. And next week it will be in the 50's again. As it should be.

[marja-leena]

Weather is always interesting, especially when it's very changeable or against normal expectations. We are all affected by it, we all talk about it. I gather that you weren't affected by the ice storms. Here in Vancouver, the snow is melting and the rain is returning - back to normal. Keep warm, Leslee.

[leslee]

It is oddly nice to feel the cold. I went out only long enough to get the mail, and it was ungodly cold, but it felt right. For here, of course, not for Austin. Or all those other places - Calif, Florida - where the fruit is freezing on the trees. No ice storm for us, this time anyway. And though it was cold cold cold, the sun was shining and my home office was toasty. Back in to the communal office tomorrow.

[Keith]

any day that starts off with a quote from Twain has to be a great day. We have nothing like your weather here in SE but with temps right at 32 and a light drizzle everyone is off to the grocery store for milk and bread. don't ask me why.

[charlie]

Mark Twain was a genius. So is his modern day equivalent, Kurt Vonnegut. And New England weather apprentices were shipped in from Scotland, I reckon.

[leslee]

Hi Keith. Yeah, everyone stocks up here, too, though usually only when the weathermen get all cranked up about the big storm that usually turns out to fizzle. None of those yet this year, but ya never know.

Charlie: With a stopover in Nova Scotia, like my grandfather. :-)

[Rhea]

I live in Boston and have always quoted that line about the weather. Problem is, that will soon apply to the whole world with all the global devastation and the effects it is having on weather.

[weatherman]

will rogers said it, yankee!